Reposted from Tim Richardson
Everybody Deserves a Good Boss. But not everyone has one. In a time when employee engagement is declining, turnover is rising, and trust in leadership feels increasingly fragile, some good leaders are searching for complex solutions. New strategies. New incentives. New systems. But what if the answer to being a good boss isn’t new at all? What if one of the most powerful leadership tools – one that builds loyalty, strengthens culture, and fuels engagement – is also one of the simplest? I was reminded of that truth last week during my daughter’s (Charlotte Richardson, MSW) graduate school commencement through an interaction with Union University president, Dub Oliver. Dub demonstrated, in the most human way possible, what authentic leadership looks like where people truly matter. A Leadership Moment I’ll Never Forget “Hi Tim! It’s been a long time!” In fact, it had been almost five years. Dr. Dub then asked about my son, who graduated in 2018, and his wife – who didn’t even attend the university – remembering both of their names. He greeted our youngest son, whom he had only met once or twice, by name. And when he met my daughter’s boyfriend for the first time, he asked him to share something interesting about himself. He also engaged him in a short conversation. I was struck by that moment.
Leadership Is Built in Small, Consistent Moments
Years earlier, when my daughter was a senior in high school, she and I visited the university to see if it was the right fit. She was hesitant to attend the same college as her older brother, wanting to carve her own path. During that visit, I scheduled a meeting with Dub to thank him for investing in our son during his undergraduate years. For two years, Dub and my son met regularly to read and discuss leadership books together. During our meeting that day, Dub asked my daughter about each of her four younger siblings. He asked thoughtful questions about her intended major and talked with her about her love of dance. He listened carefully to her and engaged her in meaningful dialogue. Dub joined us on a walk across campus, greeting nearly every student, professor, and staff member we passed by name – on a campus of 2,800 students, 500 full-time faculty and staff, and 300 adjunct professors. My daughter and I were both astonished. His interaction with her sealed the deal – Union University was a great fit.
Where People-Focused Leadership Begins
This week I interviewed Dub to learn about his leadership journey. He shared that it started in graduate school at Texas A&M University when he read The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen Covey. One idea challenged him: What if you could do something that truly separates you from everyone else? Dub decided his differentiator would be the quality of his relationships – especially with students. While he was already a relational person, Covey’s book deepened his commitment. “The beginning of that,” Dub told me, “is learning people’s names, learning their stories and their history – taking a genuine interest in them and being able to recall those things later.”
He also referenced Dale Carnegie’s famous insight: “The sweetest sound to another person is the sound of their own name.” “As leaders,” Dub said, “these are the things we need to do. I began focusing intentionally on learning students’ names – not just that, but knowing about their families, where they’re from, what they’re studying, and what matters to them.”
Dub admits he has some natural ability with memory, but he doesn’t rely on that alone. He takes notes on his phone and carries index cards everywhere: in his office, his car, his notebook, and at home. He uses them to capture meaningful details about the people he meets and reviews his notes to help commit his observations to memory. Dub told me that nothing significant happens without working well with others.
“Most of us have strong teams around us. We want to hire people we trust – people who fit, who ‘get it,’ and who help move the organization forward. Beneath senior leadership is a whole group of managers working incredibly hard every day. One of the most powerful ways to help them advance the mission is simple: know them.”
Speak to them. Encourage them. Remember their birthday. Learn about what moves them. You don’t have to do all of those things. But you do have to do some of them he told me.
Dub told me about a campus presentation by Alan Barnhart of Barnhart Crane & Rigging, when an audience member asked what happens when you have a boss that doesn’t treat people well. Barnhart answered with, “everybody deserves a good boss!” He stressed that sometimes there are people in leadership positions who are good at driving results but their team is worn out, burned out, and frustrated because of the way they are treated, we take that person out of leadership.
It’s true, everybody does deserve a good boss.
Good leaders take a moment to reflect on the people who helped advance the mission and they make sure to text them, send an email, or – most powerful of all – write a handwritten note. Oliver encourages his team to write at least three handwritten thank-you notes each week. Who helped move our mission forward? Then take five minutes to acknowledge them by name or engage them in meaningful conversation. Leadership doesn’t always require grand gestures. Often, it’s the small, consistent acts of recognition that leave the biggest impact.
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